Would you just listen and please don't say a word, just yet, I'd like you to think back to the very first time we met, how you felt around me? The memories we shared, and just remember that once upon a time, you really cared. But things are just not the same anymore.

Now think about how we parted, and how much I cried, but please don't speak, remember that I never ever lied, that I told you the honest truth about everything. But now I'd like you to know that my heart broke bit by bit. I'm just too naive.

I'd seriously need a peace life now. I couldn't handle any external pressure anymore. Not even a bit. I'm just too weak, too unprepare for it all. I just hope you will be happy all the time. Sometimes I'd like you to remember that once upon a time, I said forever, that I had hopes and dreams, and I was the one who threw them away today, and this is something I will always regret until my dying day.

It's now 4.45am and the clock is still ticking. I'm blogging now but it's not because I woke up too early, it's just that I didn't sleep at all. Seriously, I do not know what to write at this moment of time, or perhaps I got too many things to write but I just could'nt find the proper way to put it in perfectly?

I have seriously enough of "I'm okay, don worry" when I'm not okay at all. All these while, I have been trying my very best to make all of you happy and yet I didnt really expect anything in return. But why things just changed 360 degree in just a blink of eyes?

When you thought I wasn't brave enough to walk beside you, I was behind you every step of the way, still filled with awe because of the beauty that stands before me. When you thought I was too deaf to hear your heartbeat, I didn't want to assume anything and I was afraid to lose our friendship. When you thought I wasn't there to catch you. It was because you never gave me the chance. You never reached the bottom, and you've already grabbed a branch.

Seriously, I really do not know who to refer to now in this extent. I'm used to have you to look for whenever I encounter any unhappiness and problem. But now, who can I actually turn to when the next moment I realise the only person who can stop me from crying, is ironically the one who actually make me cry?

The only thing I can say now is just "I love You and I miss You". But I don think it does matter anymore, right? I respect your decision. What you wanted to say had been said. And it just happened. I will just take that. Its very harsh. Harsh up till the extent of me not even able to stand up on my own feet once again i guess. Life is like that sometimes?

Life? Out of a sudden, I felt like life is so dispensable. At any moment, people can just leave us. I'm not going to name people. Many good people die every day before we even realise their qualities. The question now is, it is only through death that we realise the goodness in life? Why does it take death to make us want to better overselves, or to help the helpless? I seriously don't have an answer to it. The only thing that I could say is, life is just aint fair all the time.